How many Heinrichses does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.
The division of labour in our house has always been vaguely divided along traditional gender lines. I have no problem with this, except when my brother tries to tell me to make him a sandwich. Mom would have a hard time shoveling, and I'm not sure I'd dare eat something Dad baked, but we kids are pretty versatile. Still, when things need to get done, usually Dad asks my brother to help shovel and Mom asks my sister or me to help with the baking. Personally, I would rather bake than shovel, so this usually works out pretty well. On occasion, however, we do things slightly outside our standard routine. For example: yesterday, I mowed the lawn. My dad and I had to work together to start the machine, and my brother came out to help with the bag of grass clippings, but other than that I was flying solo.
Usually it's my brother that changes all the burned out light bulbs. This has more to do with the fact that he's the tallest person in the house than it has to do with him being a manly male. Apparently, though, he thought it was his job for an entirely different reason.
The last few days I've been in something of a cleaning frenzy, and as I was wiping down the bathroom I noticed that one of the lights was burned out. Thinking to save myself some time and a trip downstairs, I yelled at my brother to please grab me a hundred watt bulb. Feeling helpful, he fetched it and brought it back before I even asked twice.
"Do you know how to change a light bulb?" he asked as he handed it to me.
I turned off the lights.
I unscrewed the old bulb.
I screwed in the new bulb.
"Oh," said my brother, mildly surprised. "Good job."
"Wait a minute," said I. "What did you just ask me?"
"Never mind," he replied and scuttled off to his room.
"One only needs two tools in life: WD-40 to make things go, and duct tape to make them stop." G.M. Weilacher