Thursday, 21 May 2009

The Three Criteria

Spring (however cold and wet it may be) is the time for new life, new jobs, and, apparently, new romances. A lot of people in my circle of friends and acquaintances are "coupling up". Therefore, it seems only practical to relay to everyone the same wise advice that I've received on the matter.

When I was in Peru, the male team leader sat us girls all down (or we were already sitting down... or we harassed him to give us advice...) and told us three important things to require in a man. The first two he gave us pretty easily, but the third he made us wait for a few days, telling us we'd have to buy the book. We wormed it out of him eventually.

So here they are, the three criteria that any man who wishes to pursue a girl must satisfy:

1. He has to be breathing (by himself)
2. He can't suck

and (dun duh duuunnn)

3. He has to be creative so that he can romance and surprise her.

Take it to heart, these are words of wisdom. I'm still waiting for the book to come out, Shaun. :-)

"Picado-er!" Shaun, to a misbehaving Edward (translates into something like "sinner")


art said...

I can add an important requirement:

The male candidate must pass an interview process from the girl's father. This may be a multi-day, multi-part, multi-faceted extended interview too.

Kate said...

I agree with your Dad! Multi-day/part/faceted interviews are a must!

CavDawg said...

I want to go to Peru.

And I still read your blog. This is mostly to say hi.

I also don't think it's asking too much that the guy have at least one superpower, right? I mean, just one. It could even be to survive the above-mentioned interview.

Kirk said...

Nah, I don't think long extended interviews are necessary. If the guy is anything like the one who just started dating my sis, he'll be so nervous, he'll prolong it long enough trying to just ask for permission to date her.